Month: May 2007

the little things

i am a people watcher. not in a creepy way that makes someone feel uncomfortable, moreso an observatory way that is not intrusive. i especially enjoy couples. the subtle intimacy of two people who share a romantic interest makes me smile.

today while i was eating lunch, i saw one such couple. i noticed them when they walked in. they had an aura of positive energy. they passed my table when they were being seated. i liked how the man placed his hand (ever so lightly) on the small of the woman’s back to guide her toward the table, pulling her chair out as though it were second nature. their lunch was a series of these familiar exchanges and i found myself drawn to the comfort of their interaction. i think it was the implied history that intruiged me. knowing that they’d grown accustom to the rythm of one another’s speech– the space between words, inevitable pauses, the punctuation of a smile. He silently predicting that she would order the same thing, just like she always did every time they came to this restaurant, even though she always said she would try something new. She anticipating the exact moment when he would systematically clean each utensil with the extra napkin that she knew he would ask the waitress for. things they could only know because they knew each other.

these moments in life are my secret pleasures. the daddy who lovingly brushes a stray hair from his baby girl’s cheek. two friends giggling as a look that only they can interperet passes between them. in this cold world of strangers, i search for glimpses of humanity. the couple in the restaurant did not speak english, but love needs no interpreter. with the constant barrage of negativity it is easy to forget how much good still exists, it’s what keeps me grounded. no matter what storms rage externally, to quote india arie, “ain’t nothin in the whole wide world like the peace that i have found, in the little things, and the joy they bring.”

peace and love to you all — gary bartz.

information overload

isn’t it crazy how you can become attached to inanimate objects as though they were living breathing things? this past weekend i finally got around to building my new computer…well, actually, i bought the parts and my friend from work built it for me, i just handed him stuff.

the new computer is so much faster, sleeker and quieter…and, empty. after he built it, i looked in the case and said “is that all?” what had happened to all of the extra crap? the cables, the sound card, the “guts” of the computer? consolidated on the motherboard. remember back in the day when people had to take a stack of punched cards to a room where the computer was (and it literally took up the entire room) and load them (in sequence) then wait for hours while it executed? well, neither do i, but that’s how it used to be.

these days, you get more bang for your buck. more space, more memory, faster processor, and while it would seem that those things should buy you more time, they only serve to ciphon away what little that you do. mobile devices and the need for constant information stimulus keep us coming back for more. i think my attention span has been cut in half in the last year or so. i am the queen of multi-tasking. i cannot recall the last time i actually did ONE thing at a time. i think it actually makes me uncomfortable. i am usually talking on my landline while texting on my cell, blogging on my computer, youtubing videos, and a host of other things. when will the insanity end??

it is an actual prerequisite that whenever i stay in a hotel, there must be internet access. i do not travel without my laptop. it is fair to say, i am addicted. my “quiet” time is when i am flying. this is when i read, journal…think. it isn’t that i don’t do those things when i am at home, it’s just that it takes me much longer to get around to doing them. my scrapbooking projects lay haphazardly strewn about my living room floor, and the beep of my text message alert is a constant source of interruption while writing.

i think i will resolve to schedule weekly quiet time, no phone, no internet, just me and my thoughts, a good book, my journal…then, maybe i’ll slow down long enough to catch up with myself.